The Plague of Entitlement

Please make it stop.

I don't think anyone really likes when other people come off as entitled. It doesn't feel good to have someone act like they deserve more than you for no other reason than they're high on themselves. It's incredibly annoying and can make you feel dismissed and less than. My perspective is well-seasoned, and though my opinions might not be for everyone, it's important to discuss a topical subject that's been on a lot of people’s lips. The entitlement that's increasingly pervasive in the dance music scene.

When I was coming up, I listened and learned. It was inherent. I didn’t even have to think about it. I was in awe of my elders. Some of them were the very people who were part of it from the beginning. I picked up any nuggets of knowledge and etiquette I could along the way. And among the lessons, it was quite clear that respect and gratitude were at the top of the list. Respect for oneself and others. Gratitude for every single space, every fleeting moment and every beat. I’m beyond fortunate. Being around seasoned partygoers from a young age helped me grow, but know that I didn't gobble it all up with a spoon. I discerned what I agreed with and didn’t. I saw mistakes that others made. But most importantly I was informed. Truly. Not by the internet, but by experience, which is what matters the most.

Let’s face it. All of us are entitled at one time or another. Trust, I’m not immune. I can be a brat. But I check myself. And hopefully I’m not saying something I shouldn't say out loud. But if I do, I have a sis who will handle the checking for me.

Entitlement can happen at any age or experience level. I’ve met 20 something year olds whose maturity is eons ahead of those in their 30s and 40s. That being said, there's a lot of entitlement happening in the younger generations. I believe much of that’s due to massive cultural and societal differences between then and now. Though the scene has always been fragile, it was much more so back in the day. Busted parties could lead to jail and your ticket to a day in court. We lived in a time when everything was fresh and felt new. It was all precious. Your calendar wasn't bursting with a plethora of parties at your whim. The internet was in its early stages and social media was nonexistent, so we were far less informed. You couldn’t get all the tea about a DJ or party ahead of time and walk in thinking you knew what was up. You experienced it all at the moment. For me, rave is the act of discovery, and so much of the fun is in the bewilderment of it all. 

And of course there’s the music. At many parties a DJ set was a one and done. There wasn’t necessarily a recording to listen to if you missed it. Or a plethora of the artists’ mixes on SoundCloud or Mixcloud to delight your ears at any time. You had to actually be there to hear your favorite DJ or discover someone new. There was little permanence. So it all counted, and it was all special.

There are some DJs out there who are among the biggest entitlement offenders of all. The amount of times I’ve heard, “I should be playing this and that club or party.” I ask why? Do those folks think they're special and it’s their privilege? I’m all for wanting to play a party as much as one’s heart desires and then working to make that happen. Maybe in time you’ll get the gig. But maybe not. The idea a DJ deserves to play somewhere because they've been playing a year, two, ten or more is absurd. I’m an ambitious person and I completely understand where folks are coming from. But do they really think they’re a better DJ than anyone else? And even if so, the promoter makes the decisions. So if you want to play, perhaps throw your own party. There are plenty of DJs that have been doing this for decades and are superbly talented. And some of them have never achieved their ambitions, played at Berghain or even much outside of their own city. Be happy for others’ success as you'd want them to be for you, regardless of age or experience level. Support begets more support.