Is It Really a Rave?

Or is it some other kind of party? Words matter.

It was the last straw in what felt like a Costco sized case of them. A friend was showing me a horrifying YouTube video. My jaw dropped in disbelief seeing people at what looked like a Hilton Garden Inn with the worst EDM music (as if there’s another kind) playing. Their arms, hands and fingers dancing and flinging about in patterns and waves, not just in front of their own face, but that of others too. And It didn’t end there. The coup de grace were the multicolored lights glowing brightly and flashing rapidly on each of their fingertips. Think E.T. on overdrive. And these kids were just as alien to my sensibilities as they would have been. Their movements kinda reminded me of the person with the cap in the infamous 2003 Mitsubishi Eclipse commercial. But these kids were toddlers then, so it seems their bright idea was conceived in some other way. 

This, erm…let’s call it an activity, is called “gloving.” And I’m clearly not a fan. However, and I truly mean this, to each their own. I’m glad these kids are happy doing what makes them happy. And I’m even happier that they’re not doing it at any of the parties that I go to. What actually caused me to gawk in shock, was the fact that they called this facsimile a rave. Blasphemous. Preposterous. There’s not one similarity to what an actual rave is. It was yet another faux rave in a long list of ones that are most certainly not.

These faux raves are numerous. You know…you’ve seen them. Rave has become synonymous with just about any type of party. Silent raves. A Boiler Room set. And arguably the worst, a corporate event. Elon Musk threw a 9,000 person “rave” at Tesla’s Berlin factory. That actually happened. There’s probably even some kid out there that had a rave themed Bar-Mitzvah.